Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Unblinking

Here's another response to VisDare from Anonymous Legacy. It's a simple 85 words to make up for my recent overages.

Unblinking

The last thing he remembered was his wife--upon noting his missing belt and smelling the gin and unfamiliar cologne emanating from his skin—rushing toward him roaring, “You will never be late again!”  


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It was an odd feeling, to be awake but not blinking. His fingers found the place where his eyelids had been and where now there were two clock faces with raised lines and four little hands that clicked. Ten minutes after ten o’clock. Or was it ten minutes till two o’clock?

6 comments:

  1. Ouch! What a revenge meted out by his wife. And I like your flipping the time from his perspective.

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  2. I shall take great care from now on not to be late for anything my wife organises!
    An enjoyable tale.

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  3. I must make a note not to be late for anything my wife organises!
    An enjoyable, if not somewhat chilling, tale,

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  4. Thanks to you both for reading and commenting! I very much appreciate it.

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  5. Sparsely and chillingly worded. And done in half the word count? Brilliant. I always look forward to your VisDares!

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  6. Very chilling indeed, a consequence to be remembered.

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